Victim vs Survivor Thinking

One of the hallmarks of trauma work is to help facilitate movement from victim-thinking to survivor-thinking. This is why we spend just as much time processing trauma themes as we do promoting experiences where children can feel safe, empowered and resilient. During prolonged periods of stress such as what we are experiencing during the global pandemic, it is easy to get lost in victim-thinking. Victim-thinking is rooted in feelings of helplessness and hopelessness – feeling unable to do anything about the situation that has happened to us or continues to impact us.

One way to reframe victim-thinking is to explore with children how they are coping despite the difficulty of the pandemic.  The following statements and questions will help children begin to see themselves as survivors rather than victims.

• You may not feel 100% but you are still here and you are you coping!
• What is it about yourself that is helping you get from one day to the next?
• There must be some real strengths you are utilizing to help you during this hard time. What are your greatest strengths?
• Who is helping you to survive?
• What is one word you might use to describe how you have gotten through the past several months?
• What would you say to others to help them get through this time?
• You are a survivor!